Claus For Concern

The Sales team had just sat down for their annual Christmas Eve lunch at a lovely country pub when Greg pointed to something in the sky. 

“Guys, I think I see Santa’s sleigh!” 

“Maybe it’s time to switch to water, mate,” said Ant, attempting to pluck the beer from the coaster in front of his friend. 

Greg swatted him away while still watching the sky intently. “No, seriously. I think it’s about to crash.” 

The entire table turned to look. At first, all they saw were a few drifting clouds, but then, there it was: a red streak cutting through the sky, wobbling in a way no vehicle should – magical or not. 

It dipped sharply, appeared to correct, then plummeted into the open field in front of the team. A rotund man with a long white beard and a red coat tumbled from the cabin and came to a stop a few metres away. 

He chuckled heartily once he noticed the group staring at him in disbelief. 

“Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas!” exclaimed Santa, jumping to his feet. He pulled a few sheaths of paper and an ornate gold pen from inside his coat pocket. “Would you guys mind signing an NDA?” 

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“Santa,” said Danny delicately as he slowly circled the sleigh, inspecting it. “If you don’t mind me asking, when was the last time the sleigh had a service?” 

Santa stroked his beard. “Hmm. I believe it was just before the elves stopped using quills in the workshop, so… late 1800s?” 

The Sales team exchanged glances. 

Alex crouched beside the sleigh, noticing a section of hose that was held together by tape with smiling gingerbread men on it. He grabbed a nearby present and tore the wrapping, using it to confirm his suspicions.  

The paper came away damp. 

“Well, the good news is that we know what the problem is,” said Alex, turning to address the man in red. “This hose is leaking. Once we swap that out with some 100R2, you’ll be on your merry way.” 

“My, that’s terrific news! All the elves thought I was crazy, what with the overwhelming evidence, but I’m so glad I put you on the Nice list, Alex Neilson!” boomed Santa. 

Joe and Nat started giggling but promptly stopped after a stern glance from their boss. 

“…the bad news is, I don’t have any 100R2,” Alex added, standing up and wiping his hands on his pants. “I’d usually have some in the ute, but I just gave the last of it to a customer. Sorry, Santa.” 

Santa’s face fell, his rosy cheeks dimming. “Well. In that case, I’m afraid I’ll have to do something I’ve never done in my 500 years of Santadom: I’ll have to cancel Christmas.” 

“Cancel Christmas?” Pas squeaked. “You can’t do that!” 

“What choice do I have?” asked Santa in despair. “No sleigh, no presents. No presents, no Christmas. Gosh, the Tooth Fairy will never let me hear the end of this.” 

“Santa, Christmas isn’t about gifts. It’s about spending time with your loved ones and celebrating the spirit of togetherness. I’m sure everyone will understand,” said Nat, putting her hand on his shoulder to console him. 

“Thank you, child,” said Santa, grabbing Nat’s hand. “You’re right, of course you’re right. Christmas is about so much more than the latest gadgets and doohickeys. I’d gotten so caught up in the job, I’d stopped appreciating -” 

“Oh c’mon, enough already!” interrupted Alex. “If I call the customer, will you two please stop being all sentimental? You’ll make Danny cry!” 

“Oh, thank Blitzen!” exclaimed Santa, immediately shoving Nat away. “I was not looking forward to telling Mrs. Claus. Let’s get this baby airborne!” 

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Alex returned half an hour later, 100R2 in hand. In minutes, the team had the old hose off and the new one fixed into place. Joe tightened the fitting and stepped back. 

“Good to go,” he said, nodding. 

Santa leapt into the sleigh and gave the reins a solid flick. The whole contraption hummed to life, hovering several feet in the air. 

Santa beamed down at the group. “Well, my friends, you’ve saved Christmas. Millions of children across the globe will wake up joyful tomorrow, and it’s all thanks to you.” 

The team looked at one another proudly. Some puffed their chests, while others wiped tears from their eyes. 

“Of course, nobody will ever know, because you all signed NDAs. Merry Christmas!” 

With that, the sleigh took off into the sky and disappeared into the clouds, Santa’s booming laughter becoming fainter and fainter. 

“Santa’s not at all how I thought he’d be,” said Gabbie. “He kinda… well, sucks.” 

“There’s no way that was actually Santa,” said Pas. “I think that was just a slightly unhinged dude with some serious coin.” 

“Fantastic,” muttered Nat. “Just what the world needs more of.” 

“Can we have lunch now? I’m starving!” said Ant, his stomach rumbling. 

“I think we’ve earned it,” replied Alex, clapping him on the back. “C’mon, guys – let’s eat.” 

And though they joked about it for the entire meal, each member of the Sales team stole a furtive glance at the sky, wondering if they really had met Santa Claus, and if they had… 

Were they on the Naughty list?