The Invention of Armour Piercing Bullets

On a Wednesday in late March, 2006, Charlie and Mitch, two stereotypical Australian youths – rowdy, party-focussed and easily influenced – found themselves in Rome, headed for a rally against… well, something. Sammyandro, their new friend from the youth hostel, was going, and that was good enough for them.   

“Wake up you guys,”  Sammyandro whispered earlier that morning as he shook Mitch’s bed. “We’re leaving in five minutes.” 

An agitated crowd gathered outside the Vatican as the Pope Mobile emerged through the security gates.  It was black, sleek, and most importantly, heavily protected. Rumour had it that a proprietary material had been developed that would stop even the highest calibre bullets.  

Placards rose up as the Pope Mobile crept forward. “White wine in Mass” blazed out in bold black letters. Mitch, Charlie and  Sammyandro raised their right arm and pumped their fists in unison with the crowd. 

“White wine in Mass,” the trio chanted. People began throwing tomatoes, eggs, even plastic bags full of red wine at the Pope Mobile as it inched along.   

Mitch and Charlie looked at each other. They wanted to join in to impress Sammyandro, but had nothing to throw.  

Charlie quickly dug into his backpack and grabbed the first thing he touched, throwing it with all his might. A loud bang rang out and Polizia di Stato swarmed the group from every direction. Charlie, Mitch and Sammyandro were forced to the ground and restrained. As the Pope Mobile whizzed by in its haste to escape the scene, Mitch lifted his head to see a Taipan K04JF09 hose tail protruding from its rear window, right where a passenger’s head would be. The trio were whisked away and interrogated.   

“We pack fittings at Taipan Australia,” they said.  “We don’t even like white wine.” 

Luckily, the Australian Consulate stepped in and secured their release, citing an archaic law that roughly translated to Boys Will Be Boys.  

Two months later, Italy announced the world’s first armour piercing bullets.   

Shortly after, in Australia, an anonymous email turns up in Charlie’s inbox. It contains one sentence.  

Are hose tails all that Taipan make?