Britain’s Fate Restored 

In 2019 the world wasn’t quite as rosy as you might have believed. Sure, there was mass hysteria around a Chinese-Born virus which reminded every health-conscious citizen of the devastation the Spanish flu caused some 99 years earlier in 1918. 

As a leading authority in the field, and official Forensic Reporter for the Swage Press, I decided to investigate what actually went on during those two very memorable years. 

It turns out: what Governments were covering up was something far more threatening to a British economy than how a virus was affecting people’s lives. 

Unbeknownst to the rest of the world the English mainland was drifting toward France at an alarming pace. 

When you think of the movement of the Tectonic Plates and how much of an impact they have on a country, it’s moderate. For example, Australia is heading back to Indonesia at 25mm per year. I am guessing we are not going to lose sleep over that triviality. 

Britain on the other hand, has been gaining speed over the last ten thousand years. On October 14^th, 2019, the Alfred Wegener Foundation discovered Britain had raced toward France at an alarming 800 metres in a single year. This meant, if we were sitting anywhere under 40 years of age, the two countries would re-join within our lifetime. Imagine what both countries top political parties were discussing the day Corona Virus popped up. Not the virus, I can assure you. 

An emergency summit meeting was called and disguised as the G20. They began to discuss every possible solution. At the final conference in Indonesia on the sixteenth of July 2022, a final submission was read aloud. “The reality Ladies and Gentlemen is when it comes to Mother Nature, we have little or no recourse. We can only surmise that we shall have to deal with the consequences as they arise.” 

That would have been the end of this story if I had not have happened to fall into discussion with a young businesswoman holidaying in England and visiting the White Cliffs of Dover. 

Amy was the Managing Director of a hydraulic hose company out in Australia. For some reason in my introduction to Amy, I said, “Getting your last look at the English Channel before she’s gone forever?” 

Amy’s puzzled look led me to explain the entire string of facts and events. 

“My goodness,” said Amy, “but surely there is a solution”.  

“Alas” I said. “Mother Nature is exactly that, Amy, and what she says goes, I’m afraid”. 

“I don’t think so,” replied Amy as she jumped into her hire car and disappeared.  

To my surprise, the following week Boris Johnson, the then-Prime Minister of England, signed a contract and a secret mission between a world powerhouse and a small Australian hose company. 

If you are reading this story and have the opportunity to visit the southern coast of Iceland, head to Hofn where you will see three concreted anchor points. Leading from those anchors are three 1.1/4″ Taipan TX6000 hose assemblies that stretch across the North Atlantic Ocean to John O’ Groats at the most northern tip of the United Kingdom where there are three identical anchors holding the UK firmly in position. (No, there are no joints in the lengths of hose). 

The Taipan Hose Assemblies, now commonly known as the Triple Saviours, ensure Britain is once again stable in time, space and sea.  

Yet another example of where Taipan is saving the world three hose at a time. 

If you Google and find the UK is actually moving away from Europe, it’s because of the amazing flexibility of Taipan’s TX6000 range😊.